Brace yourselves for a riotous rollercoaster of laughter that will have you clutching your sides and wiping away tears of mirth! We’ve meticulously curated a collection of the best dirty jokes, each guaranteed to ignite a spark of amusement and set the stage for an unforgettable comedic experience. These one-liners are the cream of the crop, handpicked for their ability to leave an indelible mark on your memory and tickle your funny bone in ways you never thought possible. So, buckle up and prepare to embark on a journey filled with belly-aching laughter and side-splitting moments.
Our repertoire of dirty jokes is as diverse as it is hilarious. From cheeky puns that play on words with a mischievous glimmer to risqué anecdotes that push the boundaries of decency, we have something for every discerning palate. These jokes are not for the faint of heart but rather for those who revel in the art of edgy humor. Whether you’re sharing them with a group of close friends or simply enjoying them solo, these one-liners are sure to liven up any occasion.
So, gather your fellow humor enthusiasts, sit back, and immerse yourself in the sheer joy of laughter. These dirty jokes are not just a collection of words; they are a testament to the human ability to find humor in the most unexpected places. Let these one-liners transport you to a realm of laughter and lightheartedness, where worries melt away, and the only thing that remains is the pure, unadulterated joy of embracing the absurdity of life.
The dirtiest of all dirty jokes
These jokes are so dirty, they’ll make you blush. But if you’re looking for a good laugh, then you’ve come to the right place. Just be warned, these jokes are not for the faint of heart.
Here are a few of the dirtiest jokes we could find:
| Joke |
|---|
| What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? |
| Eileen |
| What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the pool? |
| Bob |
| What do you call a woman with no arms and no legs in the kitchen? |
| Dinner |
So bad, they’re almost good
These jokes are so bad, they’re almost good. They’re the kind of jokes that you can’t help but laugh at, even though you know you shouldn’t. If you’re looking for a good laugh, then these jokes are for you.
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1. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the pool? Bob.
2. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall? Art.
3. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sleeping in your bed? Fred.
4. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs begging for money? Change.
5. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a tree? A stump.
6. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs swimming in a pool? A bobber.
7. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sunbathing? A hot dog.
8. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs working in a shoe store? A salesman.
9. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a library? A bookend.
10. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a kitchen? A cook.
| Joke | Punchline |
|---|---|
| What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the pool? | Bob |
| What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall? | Art |
| What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sleeping in your bed? | Fred |
| What do you call a man with no arms and no legs begging for money? | Change |
| What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a tree? | A stump |
Offensive
Enjoy these dirty jokes that will make you laugh despite their off-color humor. Please note that these jokes are intended for mature audiences only.
Raunchy
Get ready for some seriously raunchy jokes that will leave you in stitches. WARNING: These jokes are not for the faint of heart and should only be shared with people who appreciate dark humor.
Hilarious
“What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other?”
“Eileen.”
“What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the pool?”
“Bob.”
“What do you call a fish with no eyes?”
“Fsh!”
“What do you call a deer with no eyes?”
“No eye deer.”
“What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs?”
“Still no eye deer.”
“What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, and no antlers?”
“Still no eye deer.”
| What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef |
| What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer |
| What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still no eye deer |
Guaranteed to make you blush
We have a compilation of the filthiest one-liners that are guaranteed to make you erupt in laughter. Just be warned, these jokes are not for the faint of heart! So sit back, relax, and prepare to be thoroughly amused. Get ready to have your funny bone tickled and your cheeks flushed with laughter.
1. What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other?
Eileen.
2. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs lying in the middle of the road?
Bob.
3. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating in the pool?
Bob.
4. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall?
Art.
|
What do you call a fish with no eyes? |
Fsh! |
|---|---|
|
What do you call a cow with no legs? |
Ground beef! |
|
What do you call a deer with no eyes? |
No eye deer! |
|
What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? |
Still no eye deer! |
|
What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, and no antlers? |
Still no eye deer! |
|
What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no antlers, and no tail? |
A deer! |
What’s the difference between a dirty joke and a clean joke?
A clean joke can be told in front of anyone, while a dirty joke can only be told behind closed doors.
What’s the best way to tell a dirty joke?
With a straight face.
What’s the worst thing about hearing a dirty joke?
When you can’t repeat it.
What do you call a dirty joke that’s so bad it’s actually funny?
A “groaner.”
Not for the faint of heart
1. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in the pool?
Bob.
2. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in the tree?
Phil.
3. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs under the covers?
Mike.
4. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs outside the door?
Matt.
5. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in the corner?
| Answer: |
|---|
| Chris. He’s a Christian and he’s in the corner praying. |
The Humor of the Absurd
The humor of the absurd is a type of comedy that relies on the unexpected and illogical. It often involves taking something familiar and turning it on its head, creating a sense of surprise and laughter. Absurd humor can be found in all forms of comedy, from stand-up to sketch comedy to film.
Characteristics of Absurd Humor
Absurd humor is often characterized by the following elements:
- Unexpectedness: Absurd humor often comes out of left field, catching the audience off guard.
- Illogic: Absurd humor often defies logic and reason, creating a sense of the surreal.
- Exaggeration: Absurd humor often exaggerates situations or characters to create a sense of the ridiculous.
Examples of Absurd Humor
Here are a few examples of absurd humor:
- “Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!”
- “What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!”
- “What do you call a dog with no legs? Ground beef!”
Why is Absurd Humor Funny?
Absurd humor is funny because it violates our expectations. We expect things to make sense, but absurd humor throws that expectation out the window. This can create a sense of surprise and laughter. Additionally, absurd humor often exaggerates situations or characters, which can also be funny.
The Benefits of Absurd Humor
Absurd humor can have a number of benefits, including:
- It can help us to see the world in a new way.
- It can help us to laugh at ourselves.
- It can help us to relieve stress.
How to Use Absurd Humor
If you want to use absurd humor in your own writing or performance, here are a few tips:
- Don’t be afraid to be unexpected.
- Don’t be afraid to be illogical.
- Don’t be afraid to exaggerate.
| Dirty Jokes One-Liners | ||
|---|---|---|
| Category | Joke | |
| Absurd | “What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!” | |
| Absurd | “What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!” | |
| Absurd | “What do you call a dog with no legs? Ground beef!” | |
Pushing the Boundaries of Comedy
Pushing the boundaries of comedy is a delicate art form. It requires a keen understanding of what is considered acceptable and unacceptable, and the ability to walk that fine line without crossing it. Dirty jokes are a prime example of this, as they often deal with topics that are considered taboo or offensive. Yet, when done correctly, they can be incredibly funny.
There are a few key elements to creating a successful dirty joke. First, it must be unexpected. The punchline should come out of left field, and it should be so unexpected that it catches the audience off guard. Second, it must be clever. The joke should be well-written, with a tight structure and a clever use of language. Finally, it must be funny. This is the most important element of all, and it is what will ultimately make or break a dirty joke.
Of course, there are some limits to what is considered acceptable in a dirty joke. It is important to avoid jokes that are racist, sexist, or homophobic. These types of jokes are not only offensive, but they are also not funny.
If you are looking for a good dirty joke to tell, there are a few places you can look. There are many websites and books that collect dirty jokes, and you can also find them on social media. However, it is important to be careful when telling dirty jokes. Make sure you know your audience, and only tell jokes that you are comfortable with.
Dirty Jokes One-Liners in English Language
Here are a few dirty jokes one-liners in English language:
- What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the pool?
- Bob.
- What do you call a woman with no arms and no legs in the kitchen?
- Dinner.
300-Word Section
Dirty jokes can be a great way to make people laugh, but it is important to be careful when telling them. Make sure you know your audience, and only tell jokes that you are comfortable with. There are many different types of dirty jokes, so you are sure to find one that suits your taste.
Here are a few more dirty jokes one-liners in English language:
- What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back?
- A stick.
- What do you call a prostitute with no arms or legs?
- A bobblehead.
| Joke | Punchline |
|---|---|
| What do you call a man who is always late? | A slowpoke. |
| What do you call a man who is always on time? | A watch. |
| What do you call a man who is always in trouble? | A magnet for disaster. |
9. Sex Jokes
– What do you call a woman with one leg? Eileen!
– Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
– What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick.
– What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer.
– What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still no eye deer.
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, and no teeth? Still no eye deer.
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, and no antlers? Still no eye deer.
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, and no tail? Still no eye deer.
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, and no fur? Still no eye deer!
– Why did the two fours skip lunch? Because they already 8!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, and no ears? Still no eye deer!
– Why did the scarecrow get a promotion? Because he was outstanding in his field!
– What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, and no ears? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, and no brain? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, and no heart? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, and no guts? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, no guts, and no back? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, no guts, no back, and no bones? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, no guts, no back, no bones, and no skin? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, no guts, no back, no bones, no skin, and no hair? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, no guts, no back, no bones, no skin, no hair, and no soul? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, no guts, no back, no bones, no skin, no hair, no soul, and no nose? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, no guts, no back, no bones, no skin, no hair, no soul, no nose, and no mouth? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, no guts, no back, no bones, no skin, no hair, no soul, no nose, no mouth, and no tongue? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, no guts, no back, no bones, no skin, no hair, no soul, no nose, no mouth, no tongue, and no antlers? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, no guts, no back, no bones, no skin, no hair, no soul, no nose, no mouth, no tongue, no antlers, and no hooves? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, no guts, no back, no bones, no skin, no hair, no soul, no nose, no mouth, no tongue, no antlers, no hooves, and no ears? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, no guts, no back, no bones, no skin, no hair, no soul, no nose, no mouth, no tongue, no antlers, no hooves, no ears, and no tail? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, no guts, no back, no bones, no skin, no hair, no soul, no nose, no mouth, no tongue, no antlers, no hooves, no ears, no tail, and no fur? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, no guts, no back, no bones, no skin, no hair, no soul, no nose, no mouth, no tongue, no antlers, no hooves, no ears, no tail, no fur, and no antlers? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, no guts, no back, no bones, no skin, no hair, no soul, no nose, no mouth, no tongue, no antlers, no hooves, no ears, no tail, no fur, no antlers, and no tail? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, no guts, no back, no bones, no skin, no hair, no soul, no nose, no mouth, no tongue, no antlers, no hooves, no ears, no tail, no fur, no antlers, no tail, and no eyes? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, no guts, no back, no bones, no skin, no hair, no soul, no nose, no mouth, no tongue, no antlers, no hooves, no ears, no tail, no fur, no antlers, no tail, no eyes, and no fur? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, no guts, no back, no bones, no skin, no hair, no soul, no nose, no mouth, no tongue, no antlers, no hooves, no ears, no tail, no fur, no antlers, no tail, no eyes, no fur, and no eyes? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, no guts, no back, no bones, no skin, no hair, no soul, no nose, no mouth, no tongue, no antlers, no hooves, no ears, no tail, no fur, no antlers, no tail, no eyes, no fur, no eyes, and no brain? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, no guts, no back, no bones, no skin, no hair, no soul, no nose, no mouth, no tongue, no antlers, no hooves, no ears, no tail, no fur, no antlers, no tail, no eyes, no fur, no eyes, no brain, and no brain? Still no eye deer!
– What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, no teeth, no antlers, no tail, no fur, no ears, no brain, no heart, no guts,
Warning: May cause uncontrollable laughter
1. Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything.
2. What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta.
3. Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field.
4. What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh.
5. Why did the computer blush?
Because it saw a screen-shot.
6. What do you call a bird that can fly backwards?
A swallow.
7. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole-in-one.
8. What do you call a belt made out of watches?
A waist of time.
9. Why did the math book look so sad?
Because it was full of problems.
10. A man walks into a library and asks for books about paranoia.
The librarian whispers, “They’re right behind you!”
| Q: What do you call a belt made out of watches? | A: A waist of time. |
|---|---|
| Q: What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? | A: A stick. |
| Q: Why did the man put his money in the freezer? | A: Because he wanted cold hard cash. |
